Week 15 -With a 5 month old baby Malone is forced to go to baby classes and bars…

Gawd. This mum malarkey is great and all that, but baby classes? Snore… Singing ‘old MacDonald has a farm’ at 10 o’clock in the morning with loads of middle aged mums and scabby snotty nosed toddlers isn’t my idea of a party. And is it me or are mums getting much much older? All the women looked way past child bearing age I thought maybe they were they were with their grandchildren. I mean I’m 34 but these women must have been 50 something seriously modern science is amazing. Hehee. It’s weird to think I could have children when I’m in my 40’s and weird to think that my chance to have more children will also diminish as each year passes. I’d like to have a baby next time with someone who wants to be part of a relationship, feel like I’m missing out on that experience abit. I see all the couples at the baby clinic enjoying their baby’s antics and I think oh poor me. but then I remind myself that they are probably rowing all the time about who’s turn it is to do the night feeds, and competing about who works harder mum at home, or dad at work.

Hmmm I just spent an hour on a dating website, my friend tells me that it’s now socially acceptable to date online. Some guy wrote me a lovely email saying “you sound perfect for me, unfortunately I’m 27 and off to live in the USA soon, good luck with what you doing whatever your doing it’s working….” Isn’t that nice? So I reply with a witty retort and he replies, “in relation to your comedy, someone born on the same day as me once said - tis better to remain quiet and be thought of as a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt. Ha-ha!!! How rude but how brilliant, what a great insult. Not sure I deserved it or if that was the purpose of online dating… but then I got another dating email from a media lawyer saying I sounded interesting, I told him I just had a baby etc (which I debated mentioning) and he said things like, “ wow that’s a huge thing to go through” and gave me loads of sympathy, so that cheered me. I’ve got to try remember there are nice guys out there. I guess with online dating, it’s just basically a way of flirting without leaving the comfort of your front room, which is handy when you can’t. Ex reckons I got to bars more than him, but he can’t expect me to stay in and watch football with him can he? I’m almost forced to go out and party. Looking forward to the day when I have blokey and I can just slip off to his for the night ahhh and sleep all night, or go out to a club and get in at 530am rather than get up at 530am to feed a baby….